Nov 272012
 

I must confess, I stole the title of this post from a blogging friend (and I, too, am pretty sure it’s not a ‘real’ word).  His post entitled Explicit Recollectivity helped me relax before my London trip.  In it, he talked about how we learn the most from an experience after it’s over – not when we’re anticipating it, not when we’re experiencing it, but when we are reflecting back, making connections, and fitting it together with the rest of our lives.

I’ve spent the last 7 days in London and now that I’m back on U.S. soil, it’s time for some ‘recollectivity.’  If I’m doing the math right, 7 days abroad equals about 25 blogs post so hold on, here we go!

Writing Airport

 Posted by at 17:33
Nov 182012
 

If you know me at all, you know I’m a planner.  A list maker.  When faced with a task or an event, I break it down, write it down and attack it in baby steps.  I totally buy into the philosophy that “For every minute spent in organizing, an hour is earned.”  (This may or may not be a Ben Franklin quote, if you believe the Internet.)

When faced with my upcoming trip to London, I earned more hours than I will be ‘across the pond’.

 

First stop: Google.  What the heck did we do before Google?  I googled everything London.  Best places to visit…..  Maps of…..  Films about….. Books about….   I created an Excel file to keep track of my finds and I bookmarked more websites than there are Doctor Who episodes.

 

Next stop: Library.  Well, actually, the Library website, one of my personal favorites.  With a  library card you can look up books online, request a copy of the book and they will send it to any library of your choice in our city library system.  You can then walk in, find your books labeled with your name on a shelf right inside the front door, and sprint to the self-checkout kiosk before you are sucked into the void.  This works extremely well when I don’t have hours to spend savoring all the stacks have to offer.

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I pulled out books on places to visit as well as a few works of fiction set in London.  Whether I visit all the places I’ve read about or not, I’ve already wandered down those streets in my mind: Bliss.

 

As the trip approaches, I am busy fleshing out my Excel chart and adding bookmarked sites to my Google Map.   I am bouncing from book to book, cross-referencing and researching each area.   I’ve downloaded podcasts with travel tips and audio walking tours of some key attractions.  I’ve now consolidated my to-do list down to 4 items: plan for London, read about London, blog about London and rest up for London.

I’ve crossed off the first three, so all that’s left is to bid you goodnight.

 Posted by at 19:59
Nov 172012
 

In just 48 hours, I will be boarding a plane for London.  I am part of a choir that will be singing at the American Embassy Thanksgiving Service at St. Paul’s Cathedral.  It’s a plan that’s been in the works for nearly a year, but it still feels unreal.  

The Thames, the Tower of London, the Tube, Big Ben.  These are all just words without substance.

There’s been so much talking, planning, rehearsing and fundraising that the actual trip seems like an afterthought.  At least that’s what it feels like now.  

I’m sure it won’t once I land at Heathrow.  

I’m sure it won’t once I’m on the plane.  

I’m sure it won’t once my suitcase is packed.

Sometime in the next 2 days, London will become a reality.  I can’t wait!

 Posted by at 21:22
Sep 062012
 

We loaded up and headed to the ‘bu for Labor Day weekend.  Nine preteen girls, seven moms, and two dads with adventurous souls and a bit of camping chutzpah.

Malibu Creek State Park is scrub camping unless you get one of the shady spots, which we didn’t.  We did score a spot pretty close to the bathrooms though.  It’s all relative.

Here’s where I cut out the boring bits and serve up just the highlights.

It was really windy when we arrived so it was hard to put up the tents.

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The girls got creative.

We got all the tents up in time to take a walk to the ‘rock pool’, a naturally formed pool in Malibu Creek surrounded by vertical volcanic cliffs. It was the location for some scenes in Swiss Family Robinson, Planet of the Apes, and a few Tarzan movies. 

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The girls braved the slime and waded right in.  They quickly discovered that flip-flops float and were virtually worthless against the muck.

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Everyone swam and explored both above and below the water. My kid discovered great treasure when she dug up an old shoe from the bottom of the pool.  It had started to decompose and was full of rich black sludge.  She was in heaven investigating how being under water had changed the properties of the shoe.

As the sun pulled the curtain on our swim, we walked back to camp for a scrumptious spaghetti dinner. At the ‘campfire’ that night, the girls were treated to a live animal presentation put on by Wildworks.  They enjoyed meeting a skunk, barn owl, and many other local animals along with an African Serval that had been surrendered at a local shelter as a kitten.  The girls lingered long after the talk was over to pet the dogs that accompany the more exotic animals.

On our way back for the traditional s’mores, one of the moms discovered a tarantula in the path.  Apparently they are native to Southern California and males are often seen wandering in search of females in the fall!tarantulacroppedsmall.jpg

We managed to get a decent night’s sleep and woke to the summer sun blaring down on us.  (I got to share someone’s air mattress.  Sh!  I know that’s cheating.)  After a leisurely breakfast, the girls decided to spend the morning ‘relaxing’ while a group of mom’s took off to explore the campground. On our ramblings, we discovered that some people bring their entire kitchen camping with them, California King Snakes are constrictors and REI trains their employees at Malibu Creek. The highlight was watching a lone coyote yip at an open field as if it’s life depended on the amount of noise it could make. Being city folk, we assumed it was injured or protecting it’s young.  As we passed by at a safe distance, it abruptly quit and trotted off towards the park entrance. So much for our theories.

Lunch was perhaps our most thrilling adventure of the trip. The girls had constructed “Buddy Burners” out of upended coffee cans using tuna cans filled with wax and cardboard for fuel.  They cooked amazing grilled cheese sandwiches on them and then started a batch of brownies and some chocolate chip cookies.  

    

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We had to abandon the project mid-stream since the hot wax began flowing down the wooden picnic benches carrying the flames with it.  

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A little quick thinking saved the bench, but the dessert idea was abandoned.

 

 

 

 

We headed off to Zuma Beach where the girls challenged the power of the waves and gladly lost every time. They soon retired to the sand where they buried a few brave souls.

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Needless to say, showers were the first order of business when they returned to camp. Another good(?) nights’ sleep and a Starbucks’ run brought us to the end of a wonderful weekend.

 

 

 Posted by at 18:26
Aug 312012
 

It looked like Thursday was going to require an advanced degree in order to navigate successfully through the parenting maze.  It isn’t that parenting my teens and pre-teen is that hard, it’s needing to be in multiple places at one time.  Take school, work, band, choir, and football, and throw in a read-a-thon and back to school night and you have a  full day, to say the least.  I was ready to make the ‘ultimate mom sacrifice’ and skip E’s first football game so I could drive the other two around, but we made some adjustments and hubby and I were able to make it to E’s first Freshman Football game. I am so glad I went!

As we drove down to San Gabriel in the sauna that has been Southern California for the past month,  I must say that my biggest concern was how sunburned I’d be by the time I got home. I had donned my only pair of shorts in an attempt to keep my body temperature below 100 degrees.  Turns out wearing shorts was a good idea for another reason.

The traffic wasn’t too bad heading east on the 210 (small miracle) and, as we drove the last few blocks towards the high school, a few fat, juicy raindrops hit the windshield.  “One.” I counted. “Two.”  Then got ‘the look’ from the hubby.  I got all the way to seven before it quit sprinkling. Ahhh, too bad.

“It would be so great if it rained on us,” I said thoughtlessly.

We arrived at the school just in time to find our friends in the stands and obey the cheer leaders’ command to “Stand Up for the Kick-Off”.  We scanned the sidelines for our boy in his #69 jersey. He looked so huge, I couldn’t believe it was my kid. When did this happen?  (*Side note: I think they gave him that number because they knew he could handle it with maturity and panache.  If you don’t know what I’m talking about, just forget I ever said anything.)

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Continue reading »

 Posted by at 21:27
Aug 252012
 

So apparently August is ‘Romance Awareness Month’ which makes perfect sense since it’s the month that my hubby and I got married, my parents got married, my aunt and uncle got married, and my grandparents got married.  I can’t speak for anyone else, but we chose August for our wedding for reasons totally unrelated to ‘romance’.  

Wedding Photo

Honestly, August just worked for our schedule: 6 weeks after finals and a month before we had to be back in school. We figured that would give us some time to adjust to married life before we plunged back into our college courses.  I can’t remember if it worked.  

Now that we’ve been married for over half our lives, ‘romance’ is becoming an even more illusive concept, especially when it comes to our anniversary.  We even spent our anniversary in separate time zones one year.  (Not much romance in that since we didn’t even know how to Skype yet.)  

So where does romance fit in after all this time?  I’m not sure I even remember what it is.

Lacking any books on the subject, I turned to the internet.  I figured Cosmo might have something to say on the subject, so I went to their website and typed ‘romance’ in the handy search bar.  109 articles came up.  Since I only had an hour tops until hubby came home and caught me, I thought I better limit my research to one or two of these.  Which to choose?

Just looking at the top 10, I eliminated a few right away: Is Splitting the Bill Hurting Your Romance? (haven’t split a bill with him in about 25 years), Personalized Romance Novel (like sexy madlibs?), and How to Date a Coworker (wouldn’t do a thing for my marriage).  Down to 7.  Cross off the fashion advice, celebrity gossip, romance survey results, and the book club recommendations and I was down to 2: 12 Romance Rituals to Start and The Passion Python.  

Since children and my in-laws read my blog, I chose the 12 Romance Rituals.  

What I found from reading those 12 Rituals is that over the last 25 years or so, we’ve done some version of them: Go on a vacation, give massages, make a sexy playlist, go on a picnic. We’ve even watched True Blood together.  

Here’s my take-away from all this ‘research’:  Be more intentional about romance…..Which brings me full-circle back to “Romance Awareness Month.”  Now I get it.  Being aware of the romantic possibilities helps you seize the moment.  

Since I suck at being spontaneous, I’ve added “Be Romantic” to my weekly to-do list.  Does that make it any less meaningful?  You’ll have to ask my hubby.    

 Posted by at 21:44
Aug 072012
 

School starts in just two short weeks for us and even though our friends and neighbors are savoring the last of summer, we are already back in the swing of things here thanks to Marching Band Camp.  Sunshine, my oldest, is now a Senior in High School.  He got himself up at 5:45 this morning and jumped right back into the routine.  

I love the fresh start that the beginning of the school year provides.  I’m always happy for the opportunity to reboot my routine and re-establish good habits.   I don’t know what it’s like not to “go back to school”: my parents are both educators and I’ve been a student, a teacher, a teacher’s wife, a parent, and an administrator.  I dance to the rhythm of the school year whether I want to or not.

That being said, I thought I’d share some of my tips for starting the school year off right.  

1. Get a Calendar and USE IT!  I recommend a central, visible written calendar for the whole family.  With five of us going different directions nearly every day, a calendar is essential.  We write everything on the calendar so it’s important that the squares are big enough for all our information.  Football, Marching Band, Back to School Night, Minimum Days, Work Schedules, Youth Group, Doctor and Dentist Appointments – it all goes on the calendar.  I tell my kids “If it’s not on the calendar, it’s not happening.”

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2. Get ready the night before.  Think through your day and prep as much as you can. Encourage everyone to pick out their clothes the night before and lay everything out. Seriously, your know it’s much better to discover that your kid is out of clean underwear at 7 p.m. than at 7 a.m.  If you have a kid who can never find her shoes when it’s time to go, have her put them by the front door before she goes to bed.  Establish a gathering place for everything you need to take with you when you leave in the morning: backpacks, instruments, sports equipment, P.E. clothes, etc.  Consider packing the car the night before if that’s practical. The more you can do before you go to sleep, the easier your morning will be.  

3. Use the power of 15 Minutes.  I’ve written before about the power of 15 minutes, but it comes into play again at this time of year.  When faced with homework, especially after a carefree summer, it’s easy to become overwhelmed.  If you’re faced with a whiny or defiant kid at homework time, set the timer for 15 minutes.  Challenge them to focus until the timer goes off and then reward them with a brain break.  Sometimes you’ll find that they’ll keep working after the timer goes off just because they are so close to finishing or they’ve gotten into the groove.  

4. Read everything the school sends home on the day it comes home.  I know, it’s a ton but it’s important to know what’s going on and you don’t want to be the parent who forgot to pick up your kid on the first minimum day.  Transfer all the important dates straight to the calendar right away and toss all the papers that you won’t need.   My least favorite thing about starting a new school year is all the paperwork that I have to fill out as the parent.  Fill out and sign everything on the day it comes home so you don’t have to think about it again.  This is where the power of 15 minutes comes in handy: don’t be afraid to set the timer for yourself.  You’ll feel so much better when it’s done.  

5. Set a Simple Routine.  Whether it’s morning, after school or before bed that is the hardest for you, a routine can help.  The goal of a routine is to make part of your life automatic so you can concentrate on the fun and important things.  For kids a routine makes part of their life predictable so they can spend mental energy learning new skills.  Imagine what it would be like if you didn’t have to repeat the same words every day.  How do you set a routine?  Start simple.  Think about the top 5 things that must be done and write them down in an order that makes sense to you, i.e. shower, get dressed, breakfast, pack lunch, free time. Now post this list somewhere you will see it! It takes 27 days to make a habit so be kind to yourself (and your kids) and don’t give up!


Last night Sunshine gathered his supplies by the front door and laid out his clothes without a word from me.  He got himself up in the morning and was ready to go by 6:30 a.m.  Not every day will start this smoothly, but we’re off to a good start.  Here’s to another successful school year!

 Posted by at 08:12
Jul 312012
 

When my husband and I got engaged (22 years ago!) and we picked out our everyday dishes (okay, I picked them out and he nodded), I didn’t pay close attention to every detail. I chose the dishes based on the color and the pattern and figured that was all that was important. They’re just dishes, right?


Nope.


We got 12 place settings of those dishes, Dansk Christianshavn Blue, from various wonderful friends and relatives as wedding presents.  We started out our married life with more dishes than we had seats in our apartment.  And then we started to use them.


At first we didn’t notice the problem.  Dinner consisted of microwaved Weight Watchers pizzas or whatever meat was on sale at the local IGA.  Neither of us quite knew how to plan and execute a side dish that was edible at the same time as the main dish: only one large plate required.
Then we discovered the miracle of salad in a bag and we began to use the ‘salad bowls’ from our set.  

Since we now had a few of the bowls unpacked, washed, and ‘in the rotation’ (table, sink, dishwasher, repeat), we got brave and started using them for cereal as well.


Yum!  Special K & Raisin Bran, Rice Krispies & Cracklin’ Oat Bran (Remember that?).  But something was wrong.  


Our bowls weren’t the right shape for cereal.


I know! How in the world could a bowl be the wrong shape for cereal?


Our new bowls were flat and disc-like.  In fact, they reminded me of an upside-down frisbee.  Instead of having a central well for gathering liquid, they were slightly raised in the middle and pushed any liquid into a ring around the outer edge.

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Imagine trying to eat cereal from a bowl like that!  Chasing the flakes around the edge with your spoon, unable to collect even a dram of cereal-flavored milk because it refuses to gather in one spot. Finally resorting to tipping the bowl to gather all the goodness and having it flow out over the inadequate edge and spread mockingly across the table.


I was devastated!  How could I have failed so miserably?  Why didn’t anyone warn me?


And then my wonderful, innovative, forward-thinking, not-bound-by-convention husband saved the day.  He pulled a coffee mug down from the cupboard and filled it with Golden Grahams for me.  He handed me the milk and a spoon and rescued me from a cereal-free existence.


And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why we still eat cereal from coffee mugs at our house.  


Don’t tell my kids.  They think everyone does!

 Posted by at 06:33
Jul 292012
 

I’ve been back in the classroom for the last few weeks and, although I absolutely love it, it uses up all my words for the day.  By the time I get home, I have nothing left to say.  My vocabulary is depleted.  

But life doesn’t stop and I’ve had plenty of Teachable Moments both in and out of the classroom so I’m scrambling to catch them before they leave my consciousness completely.  I know: write them down.  

So here’s my Teachable Moment for today:  I will never be an Olympic Athlete.

 olympic-rings.jpg

No, really.  I actually had this thought as I watched the Olympic coverage this weekend: I am not an athlete.

I am too old to become an Olympic-class athlete.  

I will never be an Olympic Athlete.


Now, what I might be is one of those Olympic volunteers.  You know, one of the army of “Games Makers” who do essential tasks like clean the floor in a perfect pattern before the volleyball match or tell the atheletes from Senegal where to buy a camera.  That’s the kind of job I could have in the Olympics.
 

 Posted by at 07:35
Jul 122012
 

A friend recently tackled the question of fear on his blog.  His question was “What do you fear?”, more specifically, “What do you fear more than God?”  (No surprise, this friend is also my pastor.)

So, what is it that drives you, controls you, and shapes you?  

After thinking and talking about this for a while, I’ve found my answer:
I fear not knowing.

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Not knowing what everyone is talking about.

Not knowing anyone.

Not knowing what’s going on.

Not knowing what’s coming next.

Not knowing the plan.

Not knowing what to do.

Not knowing the answer.

Now that I know what I fear (deep irony here), I’ve begun to see how this drives what I do and how I react to different situations. Often it involves a frenzy of activity or double- and triple-checking details.  Queasy stomach anyone?  Sometimes it makes me want to just punch something.  

If I stop and think about it, I remember that God is the only one who knows everything and, really, he’s the only one who needs to know.  But then I forget again.  

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Trust is hard.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Posted by at 07:41